Kirby performance with databases in panel

I have a database with more then 10K products which i can not subdivide into different parts.
i followed this guide:

1/ When i want to preview the children it is very slow in the panel although everything comes out of database.

2/ I removed the pages in the products blueprint and create a simple search plugin with links to the detailpage like this:
But when i use this, it is still very slow to retreive the detailpage. It seems like Kirby is running through all the children() to find the page.
But it seems i still need the children in the parent model otherwise the page can not be found in the panel (my plan was to overwrite the content function in the product model).

Is there a way to solve this? Or is Kirby not suitable for this?

The problem is in the panel because in the front i can workaround by getting the content directly from the database.

Shameless plug:

Besides that, I have the same problem with a project I keep procrastinating.
I haven’t really approached it yet, because I keep hoping we get lazy loading collections sometime. Otherwise I think the most straight forward way would be to not create a children model function, but instead a new model function that is accessed by your own custom panel section and does the loading like you prefer.
Also because having something like 20000 products in a pages section wouldn’t be the best UX anyway.